Love Factor: The Balancing of Two Urges

wild african loveFor as long as I can remember, I’ve dreamt of an amazing love; the type of love that transcends spiritual, emotional, and physical boundaries. In order to achieve this love that I require, I must educate myself on the urges of love, then I must learn to manage their balance. There are two love urges that are innate to all humans. One is the ‘give urge’, which is the impulse to exert love; it can be defined as external love satisfaction. The second is the ‘receive urge’, and this urge is an impulse that consumes love, and can be called the internal love satisfaction. With awareness of these human urges, comes the responsibility of managing them; make no excuse; they are directly interrelated and interdependent upon each other. More importantly, is the responsibility of educating yourself on the consequences of imbalance. The prerequisite for any conclusion must be the accurate defining of the word love.

Love, according to Webster, is a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person. When an individual feels affection for a person, they associate feelings of warmth, fondness, devotion, endearment, and friendship with that individual. These are all positive, and invigorating feelings that act as stimulus in a process of positive reinforcement. As humans, we all possess instinctual urges targeted towards the love factor. One of those urges is the ‘give urge’. This is our innate desire to exert love to those around us; this desire can be summarized as an external love satisfaction, since love is indeed a desire. While the ‘give urge’ can be looked at as both noble and selfless, complications can arise when this urge heavily outweighs its counterpart, the ‘receive urge’.

Humans have many natural drives, desires, and urges. One important urge, that helps prevent insanity from loneliness, is our ‘receive urge’ for love. This urge is the source of our hunger for affection, passion, and acceptance. Individuals who share mutual desires for affection from each other are indeed participating in a mentally, spiritually, and physically healthy practice; a practice that assists in their individual internal love satisfaction, as well as their strides in the process of self-actualization. How does the ‘receive urge’ assist in self-actualization, which is the process by which individuals discipline their behaviors to align with the idea of self-identity. Humans tend to see their selves as the reactors to outside influence. They also receive conformation in their worthiness of love, through the actions of the one’s they love (even when an individual’s worth isn’t rooted in the acceptance of individuals, external reinforcement aids in validating the thought of one’s self). Though the ‘receive urge’ is critical to feelings of internal love satisfaction, and can be associated with quality of knowing one’s self-worth (that you are worthy of receiving the love you’ve always imagined), a disproportionate amount of this urge could have consequential effects.

black couple formalThere is an old saying that “too much of anything is bad for you”. This can be summarized by the Chinese concept of Ying and Yang, which emphasizes the importance between a healthy balance of good and bad (pleasure and pain). It can argued that neither virtue would have affect or effect without the other, because our reactions are derived from the shifts between the two imposing stimulus. This is also the case when speaking on the balance between the love factor ‘give’ and ‘receive’ urges. Focusing wholly on giving leaves the individual in an emotional despair due to love deficiency. Someone who chooses to take this route will find themselves having feelings of decreased worth, loneliness, and they may even begin to feel ostracized and unappreciated. Placing all of one’s focus on receiving will lead to selfishness, and self-centeredness. Someone who takes this route will over time drain the love from the people they contact (since they don’t give, that love in those individuals will never be replenished), and will eventually find themselves alone, with no one to feed their egos.

I have a goal to engage in a mutually incredible partnership with a Beautiful Black Queen (BBQ). In order to achieve this, I must know that love is the state of continued affection towards someone. I must also become aware of the two urges of love: the ‘give urge’, and the ‘receive urge’. Along with educating myself on the existence and functionality of these urges, I must also come to understand the importance of a healthy balance of the two. So, to my future wife (the Queen of my empire), I expect you to expect as much love as you give. I require you to require and demand that corresponding treatment. I will accept nothing but what meets the standards that I have for myself, and you meet those standards. I want you to know that, though I am the head of the house, you are still the right side of my brain; know that I will stand with you on any and every occasion, and I can’t wait to fall in love with you. Get ready to receive and give, because I have the urge to show you exactly what I’m talking about. Signing off, but never offline!

Written by: Eugene ‘Geno’ Stanley

A Letter to the Women of Revolutionary Combat

 

Purpose:

To make a public apology, and inquire about how the populous of revolutionary women want to engage in combat.

This letter is directed towards all of the women who served in revolutionary combat on December 19, 2015, in Chicago, Illinois. During the demonstration, there was a lot of emotion and energy in the atmosphere. During one point of the march, we citizens encountered our first standoff against the police state. During that time, it was clear that police had drawn a line in the sand, and for a moment, it appeared as if we were almost ready to cross that line by force and number. During that moment, my instinct told me to order the children and women to the rear ranks. I proceeded to do the same each time confrontation was a possibility.

After the demonstration of power, I agreed to go to the 18th precinct to await the release of the only person to be arrested by the Chicago Police Department (three people received citations). A friend that came with the arrestee approached Ja’Mal Green and I, and told us that his friend was arrested while no one was looking. Ja’Mal then called the precinct, and they confirmed that he was there. A lawyer was dispatched to the jail for him, and his friend and I left to see to the safe release of our comrade.

When we got there I met the most beautiful black queen in uniform. She was very kind and warm; she seemed much more like a friend’s mother than a police officer. A friend’s mother I’d flirt with, might I add. She kept us up to date with his processing, and we had a very funny conversation. During the almost two hour wait, the friend of the arrestee walked to a nearby restaurant to get us some fried jumbo shrimp. He hyped them up to be a bit more than they actually were, but they were good indeed. I was especially thrilled when she announced that he was being released. She was an amazing woman, but not amazing enough to make me want to kick the bobos in the precinct!

On the ride back home, I found myself engaged in conversation with my two brothers of the struggle. We spoke on a wide range of topics, but one stuck with me enough to make me write this blog. The arrested demonstrator brought up the calls for Black men to move to the front ranks of the group; the calls that I initiated. He said that some women might’ve taken that offensive. It might’ve been perceived as a minimization of the capabilities of women in revolutionary combat. He mentioned how women were on the frontlines, and actively engaged in battle in contemporary warfare. I pleaded my case until the moment where we positively agreed to disagree.

Black Queens Fight

I haven’t forgotten that conversation, and I finally mustered the courage to confront this topic. So, to the revolutionary woman, I apologize if I offended any of you. My intensions were to build a protective covering over all women and children. I personally have come to believe that men should be on the frontlines. I no longer want to make offensive statements, so revolutionary woman, what role do you want to play? Is it offensive to want to protect the vessels of human life?

***I’d like to try something different this time. I love the support that you all give me, and I love all of the support. If you found this blog informative and/or interesting, PLEASE LIKE, SHARE, and COMMENT!!!! Thank you so much, and be blessed. Signing off, but never offline!***